Bell's!

Welcome to Bell's brew pub. Here is our sampler!

No hard feelings

Just to show that she does not have any hard feelings, my mom is taking Inde's measurements for a new winter coat! You may notice the large patch on my mother's left hand - concealing 18 stitches and a large bruise.

Amazingly, after about three hours of sleep, we are all still awake and engaging in constructive activities (except me, I'm blogging).

Nothing says Christmas like a midnight trip to an urban ER

I was so excited for my mother to come to visit me in Chicago. We
spent a lazy day today - lunch at wholefoods, a trip to the Chicago
History Museum, relaxing / reading, a shopping trip, pizza from Piece
and the movie Julia and Julie. Everything was going great and we had
another fun day planned for tomorrow - tennis, baking and more
shopping. Then, inde got in the way. Maybe I should back up a bit.

My mom is the dog's favorite person in the world. She goes crazy when
my mom comes to visit. It's very cute. So, naturally, inde wanted to
climb up on the couch with my mom to watch the end of the movie. The
75 pound dog's toenail swiped a u-shaped path across the top of her
hand and opened it up like a canopener. If you're squeamish, stop
here. The flap of skin peeled back and, well, we were lucky it wasn't
worse.

Inde knew right away something was wrong. We piled into the car and
drove to the ER. Can you say health care reform, NOW! I don't want
to get off track, so I'll save that for another day. Anyway, there was
a 15 year old boy throwing up "into" a bin about the size of a
thimble. After he hit the floor the second time, they gave him
something that was larger. Here I sit, in the waiting room, while my
74-year old mother is getting about as many stitches. Her hand is
already bruised and her blood pressure is through the roof. They
wouldn't let me go with her, so I'm out here in the waiting room and
it's just like the one at "county," but without Abby Lockhart. There
are twelve people in my section, four of whom are sleeping and at
least one is snoring. Half are coughing. As bad as it is for me, I'm
sure it's much worse for her. I'll update you all when I know more.

Unemployment project

While out shopping for a sewing machine (not my unemployment project),
I saw this fantastic latch hook rug kit. It has a pirate and it would
keep me busy for a week. Or, would be motivation to get out and get a
j-o-b.

View from the top

Here is the view from the 400 level of the Bucks stadium. It is
difficult to tell the players from the cheerleaders. The stadium is
interesting because there is no ground level concourse to walk around
so you might get caught walking outside in the cold if you don't plan
your escape carefully. But really, when are you going to make the trip
to see the Bucks play? They stink. If you want to watch horrible
basketball, you can just stay at home and watch the Bulls.

Milwaukee isn't a horrible place to spend a day

So, I spent my day in Milwaukee. But it's much more exciting than
you're thinking. I went with a group of friends to see the Bucks /
Spurs basketball game and we made a day of it.

We started with a tour of the Lake Front Brewery. If you have not
been, I highly recommend it. And a designated driver. The tour costs
six bucks, but it is totally worth it because you get four 6 oz.
Samples of beer (before or after) and a free pint glass. If you're
lucky, you will also get a tour guide like ours - hopped up on pain
killers and drinking a beer. Incidentally, he was very funny and very
cute. This was the most entertaining and least informative of my
brewery tours this year. And, if you've been reading the blog, you
know I've toured a bunch this year. The tour ended with a rousing
rendition of the theme song from Laverne and Shirley - classic. This
picture is two of the original brewery workers and local Milwaukee
residents. The brewery experience ended with one of my friends meeting
a very nice gentleman who worked in the gift shop.

After the brewery, we went to dinner at a local diner that specializes
in something called a butter burger (aka a heart attack waiting to
happen). Everyone in my group had the famous burger with a slab of
butter on top, but I went with a grilled cheese. I'm not convinced it
did not also have a completely gratuitous slab of butter. Everyone
should probably try this, once.

After the cholesterol festival, we went to buy some fantastic New
Glarus beer. This beer is only distributed in Wisconsin, so it's
important to pick some up when you're north of the border. There were
some other fun purchases, but those might be the subject of a future
blog post so I'll leave them for now.

Finally, the game. It was a blowout. The Bucks stink and should have
just kept their purple uniforms. The place was pretty empty and the
game was never close. The halftime entertainment was exciting,
however. There were about twenty people dressed in Christmas themed
costumes dunking mini basketballs off trampolines. Most of the troupe
were very good; the cheerleaders were not. Only two actually had nice
dunks and one woman completely overshot the trampoline and ended up on
her face. Over the corse of the game, they threw about 200 t-shirts
into the first level of seating. That was great for the handful of
people sitting with us up in the 400 level seats.

Overall, the trip was a success. Many thanks to the designated driver.
More pictures to come.

Christmas

As you can see, Inde had an exhausting day. First, she stole my Santa
hat and hid under the table. Then, she tried to rip open my presents
under the tree. After that excitement, she went for a run in the park
and rolled around in the mud. Of course, that results in the totally
stressful bath situation. And a sprint around the house. Naturally,
she had to stretch out in the chair and a half. I'm not sure, but I
think she is raising her hand to have me bring her something to eat or
drink. Or maybe to ask a question. Sorry I didn't get you a present,
inde, but I think your life is pretty sweet nonetheless.

It's good to be the king

Or, alternatively, a (paid) state employee. This is my hallway at
4:30 this afternoon when I walked up to the library. Fortunately, the
security guards leave just as it gets dark - inside and out. Also, I
noticed today that the security camera points directly at the wall
about 4 feet away. Safe and sound inside the walls of justice.

The night of 1,000 posts

This local eatery kindly placed dog treats and water out for the four
legged friends. One problem - the water is frozen.

What am I thinking?

Remind me again why I'm going running rather than to happy hour. I
just kicked something in the street. I think it was a frozen (and
dead) rat.

The Second City?

Chicago claims to be the "second city." I'm not sure exactly what that
means, but I think it should mean that the window displays at Macy's
should not be completely lame. In comparison to those in NYC, this
looks like a display we made in fourth grade. C'mon, macy's, get me in
the Christmas spirit! This just isn't cutting it.

Max?

Inde is a little bigger than the grinch's dog and a lot less excited
about having these silly antlers on her head. You can almost see it in
her eyes - if I sit really still, she will take her pictures and I'll
be free for another 10 months until she puts that silly pirate costume
on me again. Didn't she learn after I chewed her leather-bound pocket-
sized constitution? I know my rights! I have a First Amendment right
to be free from forced displays of holiday cheer!

We don't need no Constitution

For Christmas, I got this cute little pocket siized U.S.
Constitution. It had a nice red leather cover. Inde decided that she
loved (or hated) the constitution so much that she had to chew it up.
Now, I agree with her on some points, but she didn't need to chew the
cover off my only copy of this historical document!

Hockey from the 300 level

No, those are not ants or a jumbled up bubble hockey game. Those are
real live professional athletes, and most of them are safely over 6
feet tall. For example, when I am standing in the first row of seats,
the players down on the ice are still taller than I am. From up here,
however, they look like the mini mites I watched play earlier in the
evening. And these aren't even the cheap seats!

Nachos galore!

I'm at the United Center for a Blackhawks game. I arrived early to
watch a friend's son play in the junior hawks game and now I'm roaming
around the empty stadium with my work bag, which apparently is
contraband. I've been told to take it out to the car. One problem, I
took public transportation. I need to get to my seat and stash it
underneath. On the way, I saw this huge pile of nachos at one of the
stands. Looks like they are ready for the rush of fans. I better get a
lousy stadium beer and go hide my bag. Glad I smuggled in the other
half of my Jimmy Johns sandwich that was left over from lunch.

Who says there ain't no such thing as a free lunch?

I am at a free showing (premiere, no less) of the new Sherlock Holmes
movie with Robert Downey jr and Jude Law - for visa card holders. Not
only did I get a ticket, but I also got a free bag of popcorn and a
coke. What's the catch? I don't know, yet. Parking is $16, but that is
standard. I'm going with it. If there is some random charge on my
card later, I'll contest it.

The down side to the Christmas tree

The tree smells great. And it looks great. But these pesky little
needles are not so great. I feel like I can't get them all picked up.
Some day in the summer I'll be pulling cat fur balls out from under
the couch and they will be coated with pine needles. It's a small
price to pay for the fresh tree smell and the lighted tree in the
window when I get home at night.

The finished product - upside down magic bars

All this baking and blogging has tired me out. Here is a picture of
the finished product. You be the judge - upside down? Mini
marshmallows? Maybe I should go with something that doesn't require
layering, just mixing - like chocolate chip cookies. I'm good at
baking those, thanks to years of practice with my mom and a few secret
adjustments to the tollhouse recipe. But really, how can you go wrong
with butter, chocolate, coconut and sugary milk? You just can't.

Magic bars - you know you love them!

So I had to make some holiday cookies for my work party tomorrow. I
fell back on my old stand-by of Magic Bars. I make these every year.
You know the drill - crushed Graham crackers, chocolate chips,
condensed milk, and coconut. I carefully crushed the Graham crackers,
measured everything, and put together two pans. (see the photo). I
then had to lick the condensed milk off the label so I could read the
oven temperature and baking time from the recipe on the label. And I
made a critical discovery. I've been making these for 10 years,
basically from memory. Corrupted memory, it turns out. I've been
layering the ingredients incorrectly! Okay, I'm not a total dunce, I
get the butter and Graham crackers in first. But then I add the chips
and coconut, and top the whole thing off with condensed milk. Wrong!
The condensed milk is supposed to go on top of the Graham crackers.
What do they know. Try it my way, you might like it.

Note that I also tried adding mini marshmallows in one half of one
pan. I'll let you know how that works, but I'm thinking it was a
mistake.

Chicken, anyone? Or an apartment?

I drive by this place almost weekly and it always intrigues me. I think what this means is that you can get massive quantities of
chicken parts here for your next party. Alternatively, if you want to
bring in your free range grass fed chickens, they will slaughter them
for you. (When I say it like that, I might have to take a break from
chicken for a while.) And, if you are looking for a place to live,
there is an apartment right upstairs. That sounds appealing - hordes
of live chickens downstairs waiting to be slaughtered, possibly
running around with their heads cut off, and you upstairs chillaxin
with some friends over a nice bottle of wine. Sign me up!

I <3 Which 'wich

One of my favorite things about visiting Nashville is going to Which
'wich. For the uninitiated, this is a chain sandwich shop that makes
hot sandwiches. Why is this special, you ask. Good question. A few
reasons. First, you get to mark your order on a little brown paper bag
with sharpie markers. (I also <3 sharpie markers.) Second, they clip
your bag to a clothesline sort of contraption so, if you draw
something on the back side of the bag, you can watch your order as it
progresses down the line. Third, the sandwiches are good. And,
finally, the ice machine makes nice little ice cubes that I enjoy.
This last requirement makes or breaks the place, in my opinion. I hope
the Chicago 'wich has the same ice maker!! If so, I'll see you there
for lunch when it opens.

Trike?

I wish I were a Cook County sheriff. This is part Harley and part Wall-
E. The keys were in it and I was tempted to go for a joy ride, until
I realized that I was in a state building and that I'd likely end up
in a state prison (rather than a federal pen). If you still need to
buy me a Christmas present, I'll take one of these.

The busiest day of the year for the U.S. Post office

'tis the season! Today was the last day for mailing things at the
post office for guaranteed delivery in time for Christmas. As you can
see, a number of Chicagoans were willing to brave long lines to snail
mail items to loved ones across the country. I like to skip the
holiday rush and opt for New Year's cards. This is also convenient for
the procrastinator in me. This picture does not do the line justice -
it snakes around inside for about 50 people in addition to the 25-30
who were lined up outside. I wonder if they are familiar with
stamps.com or ordering on the Internet and shipping it directly. Bah,
humbug!

KC

I have not given the cat enough air time on the blog. Perhaps it is
because she is smarter than I am. Or at least I thought so until she
got herself into this tight spot last night. KC was "helping" me fold
and put away my laundry. She climbed into my drawer and nearly got
shut in. I'm sure she would have objected quite vociferously if I had
not noticed her. I like her help with the chores, but wish she could
learn something more useful, like emptying her litter box.

The decorated tree

The perfect little tree is now decorated!! It resembles the Charlie
Brown tree in one way - it already has dropped a ton of needles! Inde
destroyed a bunch of ornaments a few years ago when she grabbed the
tree, pulled it over and dragged it into the kitchen. She is not the
only bad pet. I have caught KC climbing up the trunk of trees in the
past. I hope this cute little tree survives. I also hope Santa can
squeeze himself down the tiny newfangled gas chimney and leave some
cool gifts - like a winning lottery ticket or a new job. Happy holidays!

This ain't no Charlie Brown tree!

I went out running this morning and came home to a Christmas tree!!
What a nice surprise! The house always smells great with a real live
tree instead of those plastic colorful fake trees that I have featured
in previous posts. Anyone want to string cranberries and popcorn?

Graffiti limbo

First, I have to admit that I borrowed from the lyrics of one of my
favorite folk singers for the title to this post. Anyone know the song
or artist?

Second, I had nothing to do with this graffiti. Normally I have very
low tolerance for graffiti, sort of like littering with markers or
spray paint, but this amused me. He does look a little uncomfortable.
But the ad really reminds me of the scene from Home for the Holidays
where Holly Hunter is sitting in her parents' car after they pick her
up from the airport and she looks over to another car and sees a man
rolling his eyes as his parents bore him with tales of the small
hometown he left behind. Hmmmm ... Holly Hunter's character has moved
to Chicago. It's all coming together.

Time for the biggest loser

Okay, I admit it, I like to watch the Biggest Loser. And when I do, I
either exercise (not so much lately) or eat ice cream and drink beer.
As you can see, tonight I opted for the latter. It was the finale, so
I needed to have a large Ommegang double chocolate indulgence for the
double episode. Yummy. And I found some of those pounds the
contestants lost. I think it has something to do with the basic laws
of physics or something - what gets lost must get found. If that is
true, then have you seen my black north face scarf? And when did my
blog turn into an add for north face? I hope you all enjoyed the
season finale. The contestants looked great and it motivated me to
stay in shape . . . Starting tomorrow. Oh, yeah, and I think I'm going
to run another marathon. I just learned that Rudy, one of the
contestants on tbl, finished the tbl marathon in 5 hours twelve
minutes and change. I finished a marathon, but only a half hour ahead
of Rudy. I have some training to do. Tomorrow. See you out there in
the snow.

It's raining snowballs

We are getting the first real snowstorm of the season tonight. We had
a little snow this morning when I woke up, but I still went for a
short and sort of slow run - wearing the equivalent of tire chains on
my sneakers. Then, on the commute home, it was raining giant
snowballs. What was I thinking with this Chicago move? So then I did
some home snow removal and my jacket got wet all the way through. In
about 15 minutes. Why does anyone live here? I don't have any idea.
There is nothing within a four hour drive, there were only three days
this summer over 90 degrees, the lake never warmed up, and nobody here
can drive. Oh, yeah, and it's going to be 9 degrees on Thursday
morning. Sign me up!

Morning commute

Seriously, folks, don't Hipsters get cold? And check out the shoes -
we are expecting the first significant snowfall of the season today. I
can barely walk in my north face boots.

Establishment clause, anyone?

I think I read something about this in law school. This is the
Christmas tree in the state building where the appellate courts are
located. Oh, who cares, it's pretty.

Snow?

I guess I should be thankful that our first snowfall was at the end of
November, but I was still not prepared for it. The summer was a total
disappointment - the lake never got warm enough to go in it.
September was bad. October was horrific - cold and rainy every day.
November was awesome - I ran three weekends in shorts and a t-shirt.
But December and winter finally are here. This weekend - it snowed
(with a "dusting" of accumulation) and I ran on Saturday morning at
the balmy temperature of 27 degrees (17 with the wind chill). I guess
I should quit my complaining and get ready for the next six months.
Philly, anyone? Just a little bit warmer there ...

Reader response required -- free association

Please help me settle a score with a few friends.  Over frozen custard this evening at a local establishment that is the favorite of one of my loyal readers ("check"), I discussed the possibility of taking another self-discovery trip after my current job winds down at the end of this month.  I suggested that perhaps I would go live on a commune in some warmer climate.  After much laughter from my loyal readers, they asked me to describe the commune I thought I would find both welcoming and acceptable.  So, I started throwing out words that came to mind.  What I would like from you, without thinking too much, is to add the word that completes this list: old, crunchy, hairy, lesbian and _______.  What goes in the blank?  I look forward to your responses.

Hand sanitizer

Just in case I didn't see the "wash your hands or else" poster in the
bathroom, there is a giant vat of hand sanitizer on each desk. Good
thing the state buys the "economy" size, I hear they run out of paper
about a month shy of the end of the fiscal year.

Pepperidge Farms got this one right!

I was disappointed by the chocolate covered pretzel fish, but these
s'mores goldfish hit the spot. Just as depicted on the bag, there are
three types of fish: chocolate flavored cookie fish, Graham cracker
cookie fish and little marshmallow fish -- just like the marshmallows
in lucky charms. The marshmallows alone are worth the price of
admission. I highly recommend checking these out, unless, of course,
you are one of those crazy people who do not like chocolate. So un-
American.

Clean hands

I get it now - every month they change the "wash your hands or else"
poster in the bath room at the office. I'm not sure, but if getting a
cold means that this cute nurse is going to come visit me and bring me my medicine, bring on the cold! But I'll still wash my hands.